State Lines

Remember when you called me in Fort Wayne?
Three states between us
   and you wanted to hop a plane
Telling me things would change

There was such a need in me to make believe.
So I gave it another go
   and drove back to Buffalo.
As the miles rolled over
   you promised you’d get sober.
Even as the landscape changed
         You never did.

Was it something I said?
Was it something I missed?

It was the way you screamed
when you found out about New Orleans
that shattered my need to make believe.

I started to let go
somewhere after New Mexico
when I heard you drove back to Buffalo.

As the miles rolled over
I knew that October
   was not your month to get sober.
Just as I remember
   that December was not your month either.

Was it something I said?
Was it something I missed?
Was it a mistake to kiss that tall boy
   from one of the Great Lakes?
Was it the love I gave that made you misbehave
   to create those hot tears
   to streak
   down my worn out cheeks?
Was it the need in me to make believe
   that made me weak?

As the miles rolled on
I knew it was over.
   regardless of renewed promises to get sober.
Because even as the landscape changed
        You never did.

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